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trying to figure things out along the way
20 most recent entries

Date:2012-10-31 06:39
Subject:Word and Phrase Origins
Mood: amused

Chris:  "Batten down the hatches!"
Tuck:  "What does batten down the hatches mean?"
"Batten down the hatches is a nautical term.  When there was a really big storm coming, sailors would cover all the hatches, or openings, with pieces of wood called 'battens' to keep water from coming in.  That way everyone would stay safe."
"What does batten down the hatches mean?"
"I just explained it to you!  What does 'what does batten down the hatches mean' mean?"
" . . . Are we on a boat?"

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Date:2012-01-08 15:48
Subject:Do your best today. Do better tomorrow.
Mood: touched

Of course, it's the moment when I am exhausted, frustrated, and trying to figure out where my life is going that my three-year-old says to me, "Mama, can we listen to Jesus Lead On, I'll Follow?"

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Date:2011-11-27 17:36
Subject:The Walking Dead
Mood: prepared

"Watching this show makes me want to plant a garden and get a gun.  Is that weird?"

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Date:2011-09-05 08:01

"I kind of feel like some other women put a lot of effort into making their hair look like this.  I just slept on it while it was wet."

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Date:2011-08-28 18:17

"What are we doing with our lives that's so important that we can't be doing this?"

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Date:2011-07-24 06:27
Subject:i'll stand with arms high and heart abandoned

 "As much as I am in favor of equality in gender roles, both in our home and in society, it will still always be awkward for me to stand in front of the tampon display at the store trying to figure out which ones I'm supposed to buy."

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Date:2011-06-26 22:00
Subject:Meeting someone new
Mood: pleased

 "I like her.  She reminds me of myself."
"You do tend to like people who remind you of yourself."
"Well, I am pretty awesome."

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Date:2011-01-20 08:15

"Surprise! I got you a baby for your birthday. I hope you don't mind that he was delivered one day early."

Posted via LjBeetle

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Date:2011-01-07 08:39
Subject:Happy Anniversary.
Mood: loved

Five years ago, I had the privilege of marrying my best friend.  The day was both wonderful and something of a blur, and I loved seeing all the friends and family that were able to come for the event.

Over the last five years, I have fallen more deeply in love with the man I've gotten to wake up next to every morning.  He knows me better than anybody else, and we have so much fun together.  He's given me a beautiful son (with another to arrive any day now) and has made me happier than I ever imagined possible.  That day five years ago, I didn't fully understand how marrying him would change my life.  I am still learning sometimes what sharing my entire world with him means, but it has made my life with him immeasurably better.

Chris makes me a better person.  He encourages me to try things and to feel things, and he helps me see the world through the eyes of others.  I've learned so much about how other people operate since he came into my life.  I like to think he's made me more compassionate and understanding.  I have a long way to go, but he's helping me get there.

I love him.  I am so thankful he came into my life.  I look forward to continuing a lifetime together.

Happy Anniversary, sweetie.  Thank you for being such an important part of me.

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Date:2010-12-16 21:35
Subject:don't say i'm out of touch with this rampant chaos--your reality
Mood: cold

My commute yesterday was pretty bad.

I live roughly ten miles from work.  If there is no traffic at all, it's about a 15 minute drive.  During rush hour on a normal day, it takes 20-25 minutes.  Ideally, I give myself 35 minutes to drive it because the highway I spend the bulk of my time on is notorious for accidents that slow everyone down.

Yesterday, I headed out the door with 30 minutes to make it to the office.  The weather was cold, but otherwise not notable.  I had checked traffic before leaving the house, and there were no unusual incidents or delays.  I flipped on the radio for any late-breaking traffic updates, and went on my way.

Maybe 1/3 of the way into my drive, traffic slowed.  A report came on the radio of a highly isolated snow squall.  It was up a couple of miles from me, directly over the bridge shortly before my freeway exit.  It was actually really strange--the sky most everywhere else was clear, blue.  But in this one spot, in the area traffic is mostly likely to slow to a crawl on a normal day, we had a freak snowstorm.

And from that point forward, the cars were at a near standstill.  There was one point wherein I timed myself sitting, not even inching forward, for several minutes.  Though it was snowing and I don't like driving in snow, we were going so slowly it didn't seem like a big deal.  Still, I didn't appreciate the radio personality continuously pointing out that the roads hadn't been treated yet, and were extremely slick.

The rest of the drive on the highway really wasn't a problem.  We crawled forward, and I eventually got to my exit.  That was when the real trouble began.

I stuck to a slow pace, and decided to take a different road in than usual so as to avoid back-roads that might be in worse shape.  However, every time I had to turn, I slid.  A lot.  At one point I found myself going up a hill I wasn't sure I could make, and I began praying (out loud, and continuously) that God would take care of Boo and me.  I was terrified of the situation I was in, and frankly very frustrated to be trying to get to the office in the first place.

Oh, did I mention that during all of this I was having semi-painful (and extraordinarily distracting) Braxton Hicks contractions?  I kept thinking that if I made it to the office in one piece it would just figure that I'd have to get someone to take me to a hospital, and I should have just stayed home with Chris (who knows how to drive in snow!).  This isn't what real life is supposed to be like--going into early labor in a car in a snowstorm is soap-opera fodder!

Eventually I managed to slide into my office's parking lot (and it was frankly a miracle I didn't hit anything, not even a curb).  I slid two more times after entering the parking lot, and I was feeling discouraged enough to not want to try to park near any other cars (lest I end up hitting someone).  The entire lot was covered in snow, so no parking space lines were visible, and I just parked blind at the far end away from all the other cars already there.  I turned off the car and cried for a minute.  The entire ordeal had taken 70 minutes, so I figured an extra minute or two to cry wasn't going to make me significantly later getting in.  Then I wiped my face, got out of the car, and hiked to the building entrance.

The company plowed the lot that morning, and by noon (when I went to lunch with friends) the roads were totally clear.  It was as if the morning hadn't happened--sure, there was snow on the sides of the roads, but that was all.  Nothing to indicate what the morning commute had been like.

When I left that evening, I wondered to myself how crooked my car would be.  Reaching it, I was shocked to discover my car perfectly within the lines.  (Perhaps pulled a little bit too far forward, but that was all.)  I proudly took a picture with my camera phone, not believing my luck.  Then I got in the car and drove home.  There were no incidents on the way home.

After walking in the door, I told Chris about my harrowing experience.  He listened with interest, but stopped me when I was explaining how the car was parked.

"Wait.  So you were praying fervently for God to take care of you, then you arrived safely--without even hitting a curb--and when you got back you found the car perfectly between the lines . . . and you're proud of yourself for how awesome YOU are?"

. . .

Point taken.

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Date:2010-09-06 12:27
Subject:"That's what we should have done. *pause* Now I can take over the world."
Mood: amused

 It was quiet . . . too quiet.  (Fellow parents know what I mean.)  And then I find Tucker, in the kitchen, brushing his hair with the dish scrubber brush.  Now he's wet (but well-combed!).  Awesome.

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Date:2010-06-18 06:26
Subject:my little boy
Mood: happy

 Lord, thank you for giving me a child with such an infectious laugh.  I am so blessed to be his Mama.

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Date:2010-05-28 22:06
Mood: curious

One of the guys that used to be very involved in the college-age ministry of the church I went to during college is now working on a new church plant with his wife.  Because it can be very hard to make a living as a pastor who's church planting (or, let's be fair, as a pastor period), he's been waiting tables at Chili's to make ends meet.  He's been blogging about his experiences, both in the church plant and at Chili's.  It has been fascinating to read.

Quite frankly, people treat you differently when they think that you're some random late 20's/early 30's guy waiting tables at a chain restaurant than they do when they know you're a pastor.  Their assumptions about you completely change when they know a little more about you.  I can remember our pastor at Overlake, Mike, mentioning this kind of thing as well.  Like as soon as people found out he was a pastor, they started treating him as uber-holy or something.  Sometimes, it was a lot harder to talk to people after they found out.  But sometimes, it opened up conversations he wouldn't have been able to have before, because they had gotten to know him before their perception changed.  Maybe pastors are human too, you know?  Maybe you can talk to them like you'd talk to anybody else, without worrying they'd go tattle to God or something.

Anyway, the guy who's church planting (Josiah) wrote a blog entry lately that highlighted how people respond to information like that.  I think it's worth a read.

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Date:2010-04-27 06:07
Mood: geeky

"Chris, I think you should become the richest man in the world so that we can form a charitable foundation and give away ridiculous amounts of money."
"Ehh, it's been done."

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Date:2010-03-20 12:18
Subject:it's not the ageless mystery we've made it out to be
Mood: amused

 "I was this close to waking you up in the middle of the night.  But I knew you were tired and needed your sleep, so I didn't.  You're lucky I decided not to."
"You define 'lucky' differently than I do, apparently."

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Date:2010-02-21 22:11
Subject:while watching a review of the movie "Ghost Writer"

"It's about time they made a movie of that show!  . . . Wait, where are the Canadian tweens?"
"Tweens aren't allowed anywhere near Roman Polanski."

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Date:2010-01-15 22:36
Subject:Word gets around.
Mood: relieved

The orphanage is damaged, so all the kids are sleeping outside.  But everybody survived.


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Date:2010-01-13 23:01
Subject:throw your arms around this mess
Mood: drained

It's been a tough couple of days.

A lot of our friends got married a couple of years ago.  All around the same time.  Chris and I joked about it a lot, especially one month wherein we spent four weekends going to weddings and the fifth weekend of the month at a bridal shower.  It was busy.  And now, a number of them are pregnant or have babies.  I know it's the age--it's about the right time for everybody to want to start a family.  That said, maybe I should have seen some of what has happened coming, but I really didn't.

About a week ago, one of my friends had her water break at 25 weeks.  By the time they got to the hospital, the baby was breech and her legs were already partially down the birth canal.  The doctors did an emergency c-section, and the baby when to the NICU.  She appeared to be doing well . . . until her kidneys shut down.  Some sort of genetic problem that hadn't been identified previously.  The baby lived two days.  Her mom didn't get released from the hospital until a day or two after that.

Another friend had her sister excitedly announce a pregnancy.  The next day, she miscarried.

One of my cousins has been wanting a child for a very long time.  She and her husband had been dealing with infertility issues, and were beyond thrilled when they got pregnant.  Then something came up on an ultrasound.  Her doctor asked if she would like to have an amnio so they could decide whether to terminate the pregnancy.  (She declined--termination was not an option for them.)  After her last appointment, the problem appears to be getting worse, but there is absolutely nothing the doctors can do in utero, so they need to wait until the baby is born and then take stock of the situation.

And my heart aches so much for all of these families.  I've been humbled by the strength and grace they have shown--particularly the couple who had two days with their daughter before she died.  It's scary and frustrating and heart-wrenching . . . and maybe with so many friends pregnant, statistics say not all of the pregnancies will result with a healthy baby.  But to hear about all three of these in the past two days has been really tough.

And then there's Haiti.  Our church had a group of missionaries there over Christmas, bringing shoes and medicine, sponsoring a water purification system, building an orphanage.  And for all I know, the water purification system and orphanage are now leveled.  I was saying something to Chris tonight about how things would be so different if they were going now, and how it seemed like what they did (just weeks ago!) was fruitless.  And he pointed out that it's possible those shoes are saving lives.  Because people can walk through the rubble without having to have bare feet touching broken glass and other wreckage.  And maybe that's exactly what they need at this moment.

The church is sending another team (two more teams?) who were collecting supplies until 5pm.  Presumably they flew out shortly after that.  We have things to offer, but didn't get it to the first team in time.  Hopefully we'll still be able to get it to the second team.

It just seems . . . overwhelming.  So much pain and heartbreak.  And it feels a little unfair that I'm here, in a safe place, with a healthy child.  While tens of thousands--maybe hundreds of thousands--of others are dead.  And each one of them is as deserving of life as I am.  God loves each one of those children as much as he loves my son.  But I'm the one who lives in the right place, and has been blessed with health and luck.

None of this has even happened to me.  It doesn't feel right, somehow, that I should be personally upset about any of this.  Except that I just feel so bad for the people who are in the middle of it.

Like I said, it's been a rough couple of days.

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Date:2010-01-02 03:44
Subject:Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve
Mood: sad

So, Chris and I turned on the TV to watch the ball drop on New Years Eve.  (Doesn't everybody?)  He happily pointed out that we were actually watching it LIVE this time, not with a three-hour delay.  But watching Dick Clark on the show made me feel bad for him--He slurred his speech and got his numbers wrong on the countdown.  I'm sure he has his reason$ for continuing to do the show, but I wanted to shout to the producers, "Just change the name and let that poor old man go to bed!"

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Date:2009-12-30 02:45
Subject:How kind of you.
Mood: cynical

Just got an email from US Airways about how they're changing their award travel.  (I don't fly with them exclusively, but I do have a frequent flyer account with them.)  The tagline on the email is "More choices. Fewer restrictions."  After reviewing the changes they're making, it appears that instead of having two basic costs for redeeming miles--either Saver or Standard--there are now four possible costs depending on when you flyOff-Peak, Low, Medium, or HighOff-Peak (the cheapest) doesn't appear to exist for domestic travel.  Other than that, the next least expensive option is equivalent to the previous options.  Which means that every other option is more (sometimes significantly more) expensive.

Example:  before, domestic travel was 25,000 miles for coach, 50,000 for first class for Saver, 50,000/100,000 for Standard.  Now, it's (N/A) for Off-Peak, 25,000/50,000 for Low, 40,000/80,000 for Medium, and 60,000/100,000 for High.

Without being able to see which dates fall into which categories (but realizing that the cheapest option doesn't exist for domestic travel), this looks to me like another way for an airline to bleed a little more money out of their customers.  While pretending to make things easier, of course.

When an entire ticket can be had for (potentially) 25,000 miles, tacking on an extra cost of 10,000 to 30,000 miles really is significant.  I would imagine this would be true even for those people who legitimately are frequent fliers (though, not being in that club, there may be other incentives to offset the annoyance of this).

Awesome, US Airways.  Way to provide fewer restrictions by offering an even more dizzying array of unattractive options.

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